February 25, 2007
-
When will it end?
Wendy and Oma took Marnah and me to the Maroonda club last saturday night, its kinda like a night club but you can ordr dinner there and listen to a live band. most of the people there were my omas age. It was alot of fun despite dinner. I orderd sweet chilli prawns and as Wendy and Oma went away for a moment i slipped half my prawns onto my Omas plate, then after i purged it all...the meal cost $20...and i ruined it all. I then started drinking...took me 4 wines, 2 breezers and 1 vodka to get me up and actually dance! and boy did i dance...lol. The next day when i got home i called up my oma and told her, i started crying...why couldnt i just enjoy the meal? all i could think about was going to the toilet to purge, the whole night was consumed by that, even after i had started drinking in hopes to relax.
Yesterday was spent doubling my exercise to make up for the night, ryan didnt even look at me...my oma called and i could here what he was saying...he said something about be very scared for me...-_-.
Anyway...my dad still doesnt know that i might be admitted again...i dont even wanna know how hell react when he finds out. In about 2 hours ill be going to Mernong to find out some more info...
I also weighed myself...44kgs...i wonder how much i can lose before i get admitted again...if i get admitted, but i guess how can they turn me away if i continue to lose weight?
So i took a pic...im weighing my pj top so dont laugh...lol
eh, anyway i look...gross...but i gotta go, ill update when i get back or tomorrow.
Oh...and by the way....this pic here...looks like NATASHA!!!!!! from austin!! is it her?!?! i swear it is...this means she has xanga...i remember putting this pic in my xanga file ages ago...so if anyone knows her xanga please tell me...i have a feeling the nurses were lying about her death and she still lives!!! NATASHA ARE YOU OUT THERE?!?! O.O
p.s...if you see this tasha....can we swop legs for like...5 mins lol XD
Comments (6)
I don't think she has a Xanga. I am also not sure that's Natasha. I heard she has a myspace, but I don't know what it is. Her pics are on Skinny Reality a lot.
I wish I could answer your question about why you can only think about purging. I get the feeling the answer would be the same as why I know I am going to continue to starve myself after I have my baby.
is this her?
http://jesuisfaer.blogspot.com/
I've seen her journal. Her name IS natasha.
http://angevie.blogspot.com/
*hugs* Hope things start to get easier for you. xoxo
Also... this is her MySpace...
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=116632307
Or this... Oops
http://www.myspace.com/jesuisfaer
Hi hun.....I know what you mean about an entire evening being ruined by a meal......this disease kills us not only physically but by robbing us of every possible enjoyable aspect of life......where do you think you would be admitted?
((((hugs))))
Comments are closed.