But of cause I haven't become an Author! And suprise.... Never fell pregnant either... I'm 31 now... Pete and I a few months back nearly kicked Methadone but I guess Pete has different 'ideas'... We didn't use for 3 months straight...got from 40ml of Methadone to 20mg! 20!! Then HE decides "Well we've been good for a few months... I'll just get it.... Which of cause I have it then too.... It's almost pointless,we're good for a few months then bang! He's scoring Ice along with Heroin. Which remindme! I've been following my cycles pretty close for the last 3 or so years and finally I know that I ovulate cycle day 10 to 13 and I only ovulate for 12 hours! For a while I kinda would let him know " Sex time! Cmon!" But then one day he cracked it! And just flatly said "I don't want a baby! They are relationship killers!" Yeah and I told him nevet having kids is also a relationship killer...   So instead whenever ovulated I would tell him ,"well I'm ovulating! If ya wanna have sex!!" But... He hasn't given mesex on those days! I'm scared, he knows how deeply I want to have a family.... I've wanted one since back when I was dating Ryan! If he hasn't started to seriously want to quite, have kids and fucking propose by the time I turn 32.... I think that's it, it's never happening.   I probably won't ever leave Pete, like we've been together for 10 years this September 9th.....